Personal Value and Motivation
Making money is hard. It takes work. It takes effort. Some may say it takes smarts but that’s not always true. You don’t have to be book smart to make money. You can have a low IQ but as long as you earn money and live within your means, you will not fall behind the curve. Anyone can make money. Disabled people might receive money from the government because they are not able to work but if they cannot live off of that amount, they are forced to be taken care of by the state in an institution or escape that route and end up on the street. Even then if they cannot feed or nourish themselves, they will die. This part can happen to anyone that cannot make money or live within their means for any number of reasons. There are a billion ways to become one of these people on the streets but I can’t get into them all right now. Just know that the threat is real. This in itself should be your motivation to make money.
Your will to live and succeed are needed to make money. If you do not value yourself, you will not want to begin. You might want money because it will buy you things but you won’t want to do what it takes to make it. It takes effort to make money and to apply effort you need motivation. That’s what gets you up every day. What builds motivation? Self-love. And how is self-love created? By tiny decisions you make throughout the day. It’s the smile you give yourself in the mirror, or is that just me? It shouldn’t just be me! Try it. Look in the mirror and smile, for no reason at all. 😁 Just do it. You will start to love yourself. 😍
As for me, I had enough self-love back then that I believed in myself. I believed I could do something else…I didn’t know what, but the point is, I didn’t doubt myself. So, an opportunity came in the form of a short guy with spiky hair that looked half white and some sort of brown but had the cutest smile. That damn Army recruiter. He was charming the girls left and right. He came up to me and told me how smart I was and I said, tell me more please. And next thing you know, my right hand was…Where did you think this was going??? I took an oath and joined the damn United States Army! 🤣This was meant to take care of the motivation I was lacking in my life because I knew they would force me to do the work and it wouldn’t be easy for me to quit. It was easy for some people, but I am very persistent when I put my mind toward something. I keep trying and trying until I get it and then I move on to the next goal. I don’t recommend joining the military for everyone BTW.
I was backed into a corner because I had not prepared myself, so that’s why I’m trying to help you prepare. Just so you can have these things called OPTIONS. They are lovely. Currently I have a number of options I can do and so do you. You just don’t know it yet! I hope you find out. Consider your future– You should be the most motivated about it!
Job
“Money makes the world go ‘round” is not just a catchy jingle. If you want to walk on your own two feet, you need to have money. The first thing you do to make money is get a job. Find something you like or find something you don’t like and MAKE THAT MONEY!!!
Here are some tips: Networking is the best way. That means talking to people and finding out where the jobs are. Making friends and letting people know what you are looking for. You could get lucky and someone will reach out to you if they hear something. This is how I have made my living! After I left the Army, each time I got a new opportunity it was because I knew someone who heard about the position and told me about it. Now, I had to do the work from there. That meant following through and going online to apply for the job. That is your first step when you hear about a position. Go find it online.
I’ll give you an example of how important this is: when I got out of the Army after seven years, I used any and every skill I got with them and put it on my resume. I said this is all the stuff I know or am familiar with, give me a job…Someone, Anyone…I got a few calls but I didn’t want to go back overseas to the desert. That was not fun and I couldn’t see my life there for a whole year. Been there, done that, no thanks. I went on a few marketing interviews that were a waste of my time. I did some volunteer work so I wouldn’t go crazy from not doing anything. And I had to stay at my sister’s place. This is no way for a grown person to live, so I was on the grind, sending out resumes everywhere within 200 miles. If I had to go somewhere else, I would but let me try my best to get the locations I want. So, it took three months of this when I was talking to a friend of mine. I told her how hard I was looking. She then remembered a job I could apply for, this was late around 8 or 9 when we were talking. As soon as we hung up, I found the job online and filled out the application. It took me at least an hour to complete. There were tons of addresses and phone numbers and fields I had to provide to get this job.
It was horrific but I didn’t stop. I kept filling everything out one by one and then I was done and I hit send.
The next day I logged in to see the job and it was gone. The last day you could apply was the night I was working on it but I didn’t know. I could have saved it somewhere halfway and finished the next day as a fresh start, but I kept pushing and lucky I did. Of course, I got the job. Who you doubting? 😎 Make sure you stay on top of your applications and other requests you may need to fulfill, like transcripts, references, locations, and/or resume. You can do this but everything takes time.
Believe in yourself the whole time. This is how you maintain your motivation. You are your number one fan! 📣
Okay, so the other thing is to try to make friends that are somewhat responsible for their actions and their lives. You need grown minded people so that you can be grown minded together. 😂 BUT make sure you have fun too. Never forget to have fun but be safe. Find the right crowd for you. You know when it’s wrong because of that feeling in the pit of your stomach.
Search online for available jobs nearby. Some of them only request an application. An application is just information about yourself that you should already know. You will need identification and possibly citizenship papers. Go to your local DPS and/or county clerk. They should be able to tell you what you need if you don’t have the documents already.
Knowledge is power and you need to believe that. That is how you get things done–through information and taking things step by step in a forward direction.
Okay, so some jobs want a resume. You can search images of resumes online. Sometimes they are called a CV so don’t get confused when you see that. The resume should have your name, address, email, and phone number. Get an email address that is not silly or offensive. Take the job description that you found online and study it. What does it say that you know how to do already? Are you organized and a multitasker? Are you good with recordkeeping? Good people skills? Customer oriented? Maybe not, but you can learn, 😂 so put that in there.
You can learn to do anything.
By the time you read a lot of job descriptions and put what you can on your resume, you might think of some things you did or are good at and put them on there. Did you volunteer for anything? Did you babysit? Take pride in all the things you do. Notice them. Notice that you are a hard worker and that any employer would be lucky to have you.
Be aggressive with how many jobs you apply to. Keep trying and someone will call you eventually. Don’t give up. 👊
Yes, they will know you are inexperienced. You are young and your resume is a summary of what you have done. You can’t do much yet. Everyone starts somewhere and there is no shame in wanting to do more and do better. If you are having trouble, you may need to find resources at an unemployment office or workforce to help with your job search and resume. Keep in mind that it does take time and no one will do it for you. Sometimes what you have is what you have. Be proud of who you are. Be confident when applying and the right job will come to you. Be positive. If you have to work fast food or odd jobs, make sure you give it your best so that when that opportunity comes, you will be ready. You get better at things when you do your best. So, work hard and concentrate on the task at hand. Good luck!
One more thing- don’t get discouraged if you don’t get the job. It hurts but you gotta keep trucking. There is a blessing waiting for you and you don’t want to miss it because you are wallowing in self-pity. Wallow for a night and get back on track Buster! Watch those bills wallow in your mailbox. 😲
Congrats! You got the job🎉 — Make sure you work hard. That just means to do things with effort. Put some elbow grease in it. Show initiative. Be on time. Don’t argue. Don’t be disrespectful. Listen to instructions completely before you ask questions, but keep them in mind while listening to instructions. Remember that age and wisdom count for something but listen to ideas from young people too, they know how to think outside the box. This means there is sometimes an unusual solution to a problem. This could be anything in any field, so it’s just general advice. Learn everything you can about the job and about yourself, you may find that it is not the career for you, but be good to it while you have it so you don’t burn any bridges and so it can hold you over until you find something new. Give a two week notice to your boss if you are going to change jobs.
Try to be honest but don’t get too personal with anyone unless you completely trust them, but even then, we really do not know other people. We only know what they show us. Some people are very calculated in how they represent themselves to you. I had a “friend” once that recorded me talking about a guy that I didn’t really like but I was always flirtatious with him just for fun.🤷♀️ I was young and that’s how people are sometimes. We all have our phases. Anyway, I said something along the lines of “Eww, I would never 🤢” and she was recording me. This was back when nothing was really recorded. Isn’t that the shadiest you heard? Probably not. 😂 People are shady. She played it back to him and obviously he was hurt but I never thought he would know I was so mean. 😢 Lesson learned.
Another time I was new on the job back in 2010 I think and someone who was supposed to be a mentor to me was upset that I didn’t give into sexual advances, meaning he tried and got rejected. 🙄 I thought we could be adults and move on but I was mistaken. He started telling anyone who would listen that every time he asked me to do something I said no and that I was going to file a sexual harassment case on him… and no I never said that to him, not even close. If you didn’t know, it’s a stereotype some men have about women in the workforce, Is the stereotype true? PROBABLY BECAUSE THEY KEEP SEXUALLY HARASSING US. Oh sorry, rant over. It just sucks when you can’t work anywhere without someone trying to get in your pants. It’s annoying and uncomfortable, stop it. Just be friends with people, men and women and then if the woman wants to grab you, she can and then you live happily ever after. Just kidding! It’s not right for either sex to be so aggressive…in the workplace…during work hours. 😂
Anyway, luckily the rumors didn’t affect my job (shows how credible the source was), but in some cases, rumors are enough to get in the way of your money. 😲
That’s the way you need to see your job. It’s money. Yes, some people are lucky to be happy in the workplace and stuff like that so it doesn’t seem like a job, but it is still your way of living. It is money PERIOD.
I have a lot of examples of people that seemed like good people to everyone but once you get to know them or you find something out, it contradicts everything you know. I sound so paranoid but I call it SURVIVING. I have been burned enough to know.
Be nice at work but you can’t be friends with everyone, so be careful. Try not to put yourself in a situation where you are talking about personal issues or anything with co-workers because you never know when they will try you or if they will use what you said against you, even with a recording device.
If people at my job knew anything about me when I was in my mid-twenties, I might have been fired. That’s not because of my work ethic because that was on point, but if people don’t like your lifestyle or they become jealous of you, they will be vindictive and grown ass people will do what they can to get you written up. Don’t give them any reasons to do that.
Be ready for promotions. I know someone who was doing well at a job and got promoted to manager but sales were not doing well afterward and he was laid off. As a shift employee, sales were not as much a responsibility as they were in a management position. Learn what you can before you are promoted and if you do not know all the responsibilities the job entails, ask questions. Also, when changing positions at work, you could be placed in a probationary period where they have reason to let you go if you do not live up to expectations. This is not meant to discourage you but to encourage you to find things out.
Know the policies. Explore opportunities with a mindset that you want to know all about it so you can be good at it and reach expert level. I have read that expert level is 10,000 hours. In a full-time job, that’s a little over five years. In the meantime, be watching, be aware, be thoughtful, be ahead of the game.
Housing
Finding a place to live is important. If you do not like your current living situation, you have to save enough for a deposit on an apartment and first month’s rent. If you cannot afford that, you need to find a reliable person to roommate with but that is a huge risk. Plus, I did that one time and my roommate tried to take my man…I let her have him but by that time, I was over both of them.
Cheaters are everywhere. It’s hard to trust and/or rely on other people.
They change their minds or maybe they don’t make enough money or just decide they don’t want to pay. Maybe they have a better option somewhere else and they stick you with the bill. These are big risks. So, if you are going to live with a roommate, you need a plan to be able to pay the full rent in the event the situation changes. This is why you have a savings account. You can’t get mad about it if it happens because I’m telling you and now you know. If you get a roommate, try to get all names on the lease. In the event they bail on you, this is solid evidence to take to small claims court and you can get your money back legally. No foolishness. All business. In the future, I will write something up on how to do this. I’ve never done it before but once I look it up, someone is getting sued! Believe that. 😂 Just kidding…maybe.
You need to think about how far you are willing to move. What cities or towns might be cheaper? Where are the better jobs? How far can you move from your family? These are tough but necessary decisions but you have to make them. If you are not having luck with jobs in one area or if you cannot afford it, you need to move. Search for jobs in places you are willing to move and when you land one, find a cheap place but hopefully be safe where you are living because people take your money and your things in the unsafe neighborhoods. They watch you and if you have it, they want to take it. Be careful who you let in your home, it’s usually the people closest to you so pay attention to people’s character. If they talk about robbing someone else, they will do it to you too. Some people see thievery as their job, so there you go. I wouldn’t recommend this occupation because there is something called jail and consequences. Don’t tell everyone what you have. Don’t tell anyone actually. Your money is your business.
Example searches for cheaper towns: Cheapest places to live in Texas: Post, West Odessa, Monahans, Crystal City, Slaton, Sinton, West Livingston, Progreso, Kermit, Pecos (Cotton 2018); Cheapest places to live in California: Bakersfield, Fresno, Sacramento, Stockton, San Bernardino, Riverside (DePietro 2019); Cheapest places to live in New York: Waterloo, Ilion, Hornell, Ogdensburg, Olean, Medina, Kenmore North Tonawanda, HaKolmburg, Depew (Kolmar 2019).
Budget
Learn how to budget your money. You need to know where all of your money is and what it is providing you. Make a list of your bills and total the amount. Now take your paycheck and find out how much you make after taxes. Then subtract how much you need from how much you make and hopefully that number is positive. If it’s not, you need to get rid of a bill, live cheaper or get a higher paying job. I know, easier said than done…story of our lives. But you need to be able to afford yourself and while living cheap is not very satisfying, take pride in the person you are and your ability to care for yourself. If you are having trouble, do not feel defeated. A defeated attitude will guide you toward a downward spiral and you might give up on yourself. Then what? No one knows and you don’t want to find out.
Just think positive and look forward to when you will make enough to be happy and that time is coming. It is only a matter of time and effort. You can do this. Keep looking forward.
Sometimes we have to suffer a bit before we get our reward. I have been there. I have suffered and I will not go back. Keep looking forward. I did a couple of examples of small budgets that only have minimum wage for a 40 hour work week after taxes in TX, CA, and NY. I recommend using excel to type all of yours out and keep a record, but as long as you know what you are making and what has to go out to pay bills and you have it saved in your account, you are managing a budget. Stay tuned and I can have better examples in the future.
Short Examples:
TX: 1150 a month – Average rent 675 – Average energy 120 – Phone 50 – Car insurance 75 = 230
CA: 1300 a month – Average rent 830 – Average energy 100 – Phone 50 – Car insurance 75 =245
NY: 1880 a month – Average rent 1900 – Average energy 60 – Phone 50 – Transportation 40 =-170
So in TX you would have $230 leftover for food and savings and $245 in CA and in NY, a negative amount of $-170. You would have no choice but to get a roommate in NY if you want to have a place to live. The alternative is to live on the streets, find a shelter that can take you in. Sometimes you can pay a small amount to sleep at a shelter if you have a job. I know because I’ve done this, well my mom did and we were along for the ride. A shelter kept us dry though and that is the least you could ask for. Whatever you have to do to stay afloat, do it. Maybe you could get a gym membership and buy a lock for your locker so you have somewhere to lock your things and take a shower. There is no shame in making money and doing with it what you can.
You may be thinking, what is she talking about? Because maybe some of you think life is full of handouts and this won’t ever be you. Did you ever hear– Nobody ever said, “I wanna be a junkie when I grow up.” Everyone thinks it won’t be them on the streets. But even I was this close to being that person. I could have been a statistic. My dad died from cirrhosis of the liver caused by alcoholism. Years as an alcoholic caught up to him in a bad way. I don’t wish it on anyone. I saw him dying and it was painful. My mom was hooked on drugs and I was bounced from place to place. It is hard to see anything else when you are a product of your environment.
You have to be a dreamer. You have to have imagination to see beyond what you’ve been shown.
And then you apply a little willpower and like magic you are not that product anymore. You are new and improved! But not everyone is that imaginative. Are you? Okay, maybe some of you had a better upbringing and maybe you are on the right track, but I want to tell you, even though you might already know, drugs and alcohol live in every neighborhood, rich or poor. The richest people die alone after overdosing on some drug they probably had an addiction to. Maybe all it takes is the first sin but who knows? Just be careful with drugs, cigarettes and/or alcohol. It is so easy to become addicted and more difficult to quit. I was one of the lucky ones because my mom did quit her habit. She has been doing well and she is still a party animal. 😂 You can be a party animal without the tough drugs. It might even be more fun because you still have your mind. When I was young, I had access to all sorts of drugs. I saw them everywhere between both friends and family. The reason I didn’t do them, or at least any strong ones was because I had seen what they did to my family. Their eyes open but their mind gone. Maybe they felt good but was their life good? No. They had very little to their name and the more drugs you do, the more disconnected you become from the people in your life. 😢 In recent years, marijuana has become more prominent because it is legal in some states. Here’s my take on it: Do not let it consume you. Do not reach that point with any vice. If you need to calm down here or there or you have pain or even recreational, just be smart about it and don’t let it take over your life. Same thing with alcohol. The other thing is that until you are past your mid-20’s, your brain is still developing, you could be limiting your cognitive ability with drugs and/or alcohol abuse.
I’m not trying to promote these things but these are just warnings because you need to think about your health and well-being. If you are not cautious, you could be on the road to addiction and/or homelessness…it may be a long road but you never know. PREVENTION IS KEY.
Keeping a budget is supposed to stop you from overspending. You have to take it seriously for it to work. You will not miss payments if you keep a strict budget and keep going to work. If something happens to your job or you get behind on bills, it will not always be easy to get back on your feet. Resist the urge to overspend. If you go to the mall, just look around, you don’t have to buy anything. Sometimes just admiring things gives you the same thrill you get from buying things. Just try it sometime. Look at stuff and leave and if you really want it, maybe you’ll go back later, but most of time, you forget all about it. Try out your nearest thrift store to see if you can be stylish at a cheaper price. You could be surprised. You just need to stop and think about what you really need. You have to think about what you could really do with your money and how it can benefit you more in the future. If you cannot resist shopping, just try not to be wasteful. Pass your items on to someone else when you are done with them. Have a garage sale or donate them.
Work on your Credit Score
Your credit score shows how good you are with managing money and paying back loans. You need loans because unless you are a millionaire, you need to borrow lump sums of money to pay for expensive cars and houses or school loans or anything, even medical loans. You have to keep your credit score healthy and 700 is considered good. Do not fall behind on bills over 30 days.
Apply for a credit card but keep a low balance on it. Try to pay it off every month in your budget. Credit inquiries and new credit will reduce your score, this includes department store credit. They offer good deals for applying for a credit card, but it will reduce your score. If you don’t have credit and you need it, go ahead and apply and like I said, keep a low balance and pay on time. Sometimes they will give you a minimum payment of zero but that’s only because they want to keep charging you interest every month that you don’t have a zero balance so just pay it all as soon as you can. When you try to get a loan, make sure your score is good beforehand by going to Credit Karma or Annual credit report for your score but don’t pay for it. You should be able to get a free copy once a year. You need to review your report so you can make sure you don’t have anything outstanding or someone has stolen your identity. It happens and if it does, you will need to contact the creditor and verify information and complain to them about it. Also, I’m told you can contact the creditor and pay them the money if they lift an outstanding payment off your report. Get it in writing if they agree. And negative items should drop from your credit report after 7 years. If it doesn’t drop off automatically, request it from the creditor.
Click on Second Goals to continue.
Sources:
Cotton, K. R. (2018, July 25). What are the most affordable places to live in Texas? Retrieved from https://www.bizjournals.com/sanantonio/news/2018/07/25/what-are-the-most-affordable-places-to-live-in.html
DePietro, A. (2019, February 28). Cheapest Places To Live In California In 2019. Retrieved from https://www.forbes.com/sites/andrewdepietro/2019/02/28/cheapest-places-california/#6b02d7852e55
Kolmar, C. (2019, February 23). These Are The 10 Cheapest And Greatest Places In New York. Retrieved from https://www.homesnacks.net/most-affordable-places-in-new-york-126827/